Worried Your Spouse is Hiding Assets? 4 Reasons You Should Still Do Mediation
You think your spouse is hiding assets and you want to hire a pit bull attorney. Here’s 4 reasons why mediation is still better.
1. You are the Source of Financial Information.
Most people don’t look into their finances because they think their attorneys will find it. There are almost 7,000 FDIC insured banks and almost as many credit unions. No attorney can send out thousands of financial subpoenas. The bottom line is that you are the primary source of financial information.
You have to know your finances even before you get an attorney. This includes looking at what’s on the computer and in your filing cabinet. Look for bank statements and bills. Even in the trash, look for envelopes with addresses of financial institutions. If someone has an account in only their name just knowing the name of the bank can be helpful. Clients who have a pulse of their financial situation do better than those who do not.
2. Mediation Doesn’t Escalate.
In litigation, once you know about your finances, your attorney can take formal “discovery.” This includes depositions or written formal questions called “interrogatories.” A lawyer can even subpoena that information from a third party. Unfortunately, this creates enormous conflict. Your spouse may feel humiliated and angry.
In mediation, we recognize that people may not be completely forthcoming. However, everyone wants to be seen as cooperative. When the divorce mediator asks someone to sign a release of financial information, the person almost always does.
When gaps do appear, an experienced mediator can ask clarifying questions about financial documents such as tax returns which allows for incremental disclosure without shaming anyone. However, if someone refuses to sign a release of information, mediation must terminate because it is premised upon full disclosure of information.
3. Your Spouse Might Not be Hiding Anything
Sometimes people defensively make financial mistakes because they are concerned about the other person. This includes draining savings and checking accounts to “protect” themselves. This is a mistake. This first-strike behavior generates suspicion and misgivings.
4. You Still Have an Enforceable Judgment
Whether you litigate or mediate, you have an enforceable judgment. Sometimes, the failure to disclose is not discovered until after the divorce. The law allows a spouse to reopen that divorce judgment based upon the intentional misrepresention of important financial information.
Because 98% of all cases settle, the question is not whether there is an agreement but when. Both processes reveal financial information of the spouses. But divorce mediation takes less time and money.
Lisa Derr
Lisa Derr is an experienced Divorce and Family Mediator with three offices in east central Wisconsin. She started the family mediation practice in 1995. Lisa earned her BA in psychology from the University of Wisconsin in 1984 in four years despite a serious car accident that involved a 2-month hospital stay. She began practicing law in 1987. For the first 8 years of her career, Lisa litigated personal injury and divorce cases. But she was frustrated with the tremendous financial and emotional cost of divorce trials. Contested hearings inhibited reconciliation and healing for thewhole family. She started the Beaver Dam divorce mediation practice in 1995 and with her partner, Cassel Villarreal, expanded to Oshkosh and West Bend ten years later.